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Notes from a Crone: Buried Treasure

[Editor’s note: “Notes from a Crone” is a new, occasional Creative Construction series written by artist and artisan Juliet Bell. Juliet reflects on living a creative life after one’s children are long grown — with inspiration and wisdom for women at every waypoint along the spectrum of motherhood and creativity.]

cleaned-up-worktableI cleaned up my worktable today. It was the last step in a workroom cleanup that I’ve been tackling for several weeks. I haven’t been able to sit at the worktable for months.

Earlier in the week I’d been hit with a passion for starting a new oil painting. I’d abandoned a large stretched canvas a year ago, and suddenly I had an idea for what to do with it. I covered over what I’d begun before by laying in an undercoating of misty colors for an abstract garden painting. With that done, my passion for painting had barely been tapped, so I put up my portable easel, jury-rigged a large canvas on it, and began a morning glory painting. Still unfulfilled, I set up the table easel and under-painted yet another. Two days later, none of my canvases were dry enough to continue painting, so I forced myself to make a shift in focus. I’d begun a small still life several months earlier. It was a painting I was attempting to create according to the rules — not a method that comes easily to me. I was itching to paint freestyle. But still, I thought, working on the little painting would satisfy my desire to be painting. However, I needed a place to work on it. The time had come to tackle the final clean-up job.

At one end of my long worktable was a tall jumble of accumulated stuff. The pile had started long ago with a manila folder labeled “things to file” — a folder long since buried by other things to file, things that didn’t have a home yet, or things I wanted to keep handy. One bonus for not filing things away for a long time is that when you finally get to it, many of those items can be thrown away. Another reward is that the job one imagines will be tedious and boring (which is why my pile accumulated for so long) turns out instead, to be an adventure, a search through buried treasure. Like a shopping list clipped to the fridge and penciled in over the week, my pile of visual and physical things had allowed me to drop the items from my short-term memory. This sorting through photographs, inkjet prints of subjects I wanted to paint, sketches, puzzle designs, photographs, newspaper clippings, auction and gallery opportunities, and notes from buyers, became a journey through my creative activities over the last four years. (Yes indeed — in that manila folder, when I finally unburied it, were sales invoices from 2004.) Scattered throughout were dozens of “notes to myself,” little to-do lists, ideas for things to make, design sketches, notes on how to create art effects like the fuzz on a peach.

notes-to-self2The notes, like most of the things in the pile, had long been forgotten. Now I read them with fresh eyes. Some ideas no longer interested me like the note to myself to make X-rated jigsaw puzzles (an idea spawned no doubt by a desire to make a fast buck), and could be tossed. Some still seemed like pretty good ideas and reading them got my mind whirring again. But the most surprising thing was discovering just how many of my ideas had been acted upon, despite my short term memory loss. “Well damn,” I said, puffing myself up, “I’ve done a quite a lot these past few years.”

Taking inventory of one’s creative accomplishments can be very comforting, especially when one feels time is racing by and there are so many things that take us away from what we think we want to be doing. Even when your children have grown and gone and one is retired, time still races by. Myriad things pull you away from the canvas, the pen, or the camera. One child you raised has multiplied into five grandchildren you want to embrace, one apartment with a landlord who fixes things has become a small house that has no one but you to install new windows, paint the trim, and tackle the yard overgrowing with weeds. Stolen time after a nine-to-five job, cooking dinner, and household chores, has been replaced with hours of free time. If working under pressure has been your modus operandi, suddenly you are adrift in a sea of seemingly endless time and possibilities. All that you thought you were or wanted to be creatively is staring you in the face — challenging you, taunting you. So you tackle the weeds, and the house, and even take on a volunteer job, until the void is filled and once again, one is devoured by other things. The question and challenge is still the same — why do I let everything but my creativity consume me?

Then one day you clean off your worktable, and are faced with the undeniable fact that one has been creative — that it is the day-to-day perceptions that are off kilter. One’s focus has been on the creative imaginings of what-ifs and if-onlys. Being in the “now” — the real challenge — has been ignored. While one steals a half hour to write, one’s mind is watching the clock, already resenting the fact that one has only a brief moment. While one cuts a jigsaw puzzle, one’s mind is already wishing the next day didn’t have to be spent baby-sitting. While one under-paints three canvases, one’s mind is thinking about the workroom that hasn’t yet been cleaned up — the pile of things to file away, and how much nicer one would feel if the space were already tidy.

I unburied my treasures and took note of all I’d done over the years, so many puzzles designed and made, dozens of paintings completed, shadow boxes constructed, a children’s novel written, countless inventive little gifts made, and on and on. How is it possible with all that I have created, I can still feel I have not yet found my creative self? And why do I need the list for reassurance — for confirmation? What is it that I am really seeking — to be creative, or to think myself creative?

I am currently reading Eckhart Tolle’s The Power of Now. My issue is perception. I am not my mind. My mind is doing its own thing, pulling me away from the quietness of just being, confusing my sense of who I am. Tolle says, “All true artists, whether they know it or not, create from a place of no-mind, from inner stillness.” The tragedy is that so many of us spend our entire lives sabotaging ourselves. We look to the past for a sense of self, we look to the future for the possibilities of who we can be. The truth is, we are. We are this moment. Tolle says, “The present moment holds the key to liberation. But you cannot find the present moment as long as you are your mind.”

So I continue the journey. I am the age now that held all the possibilities of finally becoming who I wanted to be. And here I am, still struggling with the same old mind tricks, still searching for the truth, still my own worst enemy. But…the “now” is here as it has always been. And so, there is still hope for me.

Kristine: Cautiously Optimistic

As a work-at-home mom, it seems I am always waiting for the other shoe to drop. Perhaps it’s the unpredictability of my life and the result of wearing too many hats during the course of a day—wife, mommy, housekeeper, writer, and editor. When one of those hats fall, it sends my whole routine and day into havoc.

When I think I have time to open my e-mail or catch up on my favorite blogs, my daughter wakes up unusually early from her nap. When I think all my editing work for the day is done, I get a frantic call from the magazine publisher on our ship date telling me I need to find enough editorial to fill a half-page of space after an advertiser dropped out at the last minute. When I think I have two hours of uninterrupted time at night to work on my novel, my computer crashes, and I have to spend my precious writing time trying to figure out the problem.

I wake up each morning with one goal. I strive to be “cautiously optimistic.” It’s the motto for my entire life, actually. I’m optimistic that things will go as planned but cautious about getting too complacent. If something goes wrong, I try to be ready for it. If nothing goes wrong, I’m pleasantly surprised.

Sometimes being cautiously optimistic is the only way I’m able to function without having a nervous breakdown. It’s also the way I’m able to smile at my 11-month-old daughter when she refuses to take a nap and I’m on deadline.

I still groan and grumble when that dark cloud appears, and there are some days when even the most optimistic thinking gets me nowhere. The only remedy for those days is the emergency stash of chocolate.

Cathy: I miss my kids

K, hanging -- what you don't see are the 10 HS girls just outside the frame

This whole juggling creativity and kids thing is swinging the pendulum in the opposite direction lately. I am, if not actively writing in my manuscript, doing some research re: astronomy and observatories online, albeit while also hopping blogs, etc. I have been regularly contributing to the weekly contest, to keep me on my toes creatively, and writing a blog per week, which usually means I am analyzing how the writing process is going for the manuscript. I have been accused by my family of spending more time with the computer than anyone else does.

My young teen has started becoming more interested in hanging out in a neighborhood clique after school than in playing video games. That is fantastic in my book, except that I don’t see as much of him. When he comes home, he zips upstairs to shower before dinner, do homework, and after dinner, he disappears upstairs again. I knew this was coming, as I remember doing the same at the same age, but he’s really adept at it. I think he’s in the room with me, so I start talking, while doing something else, of course. I turn to check if he’s listening, and he’s become invisible!

On fishing trip -- S draws instead

On fishing trip -- S draws instead

S, the 10-year-old, is on a bender lately, too, secluding himself to draw comics of space adventures. Now part of this is because he keeps losing TV and video game privileges until his room is clean and stays that way. I will not spend another valuable weekend afternoon on that project again.

Baby C is generally in my arms while I’m typing away at the PC, but I can’t help feeling like I could be doing more with her. Yes, I do play with her, too, but you know, she’ll probably be typing soon herself at this rate. I’ve also started leaving her home with her grandma more often lately so I can accomplish more of the errands than I can by bringing her along. That in and out of the baby seat business and strollering her here and there is exhausting and time consuming, Therefore, I can double or better errand capacity without her, as I’m no longer nursing exclusively and she can eat food and drink juice.

Baby C -- naptime, not on me

Baby C -- naptime, not on me

It’s nice that it has been relatively quiet for writing, and I’ve been accomplishing more as an independent person. However, I can’t help feeling like I need to be with my kids more than I have been lately.

So, my plans for the weekend, most likely past as you read this, is to amp up some indie time with each and some family fun. Friday night, I am taking S without taking anyone else to a special needs kids event at a local zoo, maybe get to pet some of the animals. Saturday, I am making Honey take S on a fishing trip in the morning with dads/stepdads and their aspies, while I take K to a café for some face time while, hopefully, Baby C naps. Sat. afternoon, we’re getting together with some of the families from our aspie group, so S gets ‘peer interaction,’ K gets to hang with some friends, and frankly, so do we, as parents. Sunday, I think we’ll have a relatively lazy day at home. I want to talk the guys into playing a game or doing a puzzle all together. But Honey still needs to mow that lawn! I’ll comment an update if my plans went off without a hitch or derailed.

When Monday rolls back around, I will get back to my writing better, refreshed by the love of my family. Right — as long as the usual chaos doesn’t overtake us.

Breakfast with Anita

We’re off to the UK for Breakfast again this week, so I hope you like your toast browned on one side! Meet Anita Davies, prolific artist, poet, writer, blogger, and mother. I first encountered Anita’s work on the EDM SuperBlog. A year later, when Emma-Jane Rosenberg recommended Anita for a Breakfast guest, I could instantly bring to mind Anita’s work. She’s that good — as you’ll see for yourself. Chin-chin!

meCC: Please give us an intro to who you are, what you do, and your family headcount.
AD:
I am an artist. A published poet. I have held a monthly column in the Fenland Citizen focusing on local artists. I have held a weekly illustrated column in the Cambs Times and Wisbech Standard where I spotlighted pages in my daily journals. I am a tutor, currently running a weekly adult workshop, giving private tuition and giving a weekly workshop in a village school with children.

I am also now an author, having recently published my summer project entitled Close to Home where I focused on the homes in three neighbouring villages, painting plein air sketches. The book is available for purchase through the Blurb bookstore.

My family and I live in Cambridgeshire, England, UK. Not in the city part but deep in the heart of the Fens where the skies are huge and the fields change with the seasons. I have two boys aged 10 and 17. It’s a big gap, I know, but after holding my first beautiful baby boy I didn’t believe I could love anyone so strongly and didn’t think it fair to try. Seven years later I felt I was ready and changed my mind. I was wrong…it is possible to love that deeply twice.

icedreflectionsCC: Tell us about your artwork and what you sell in your online shop.
AD:
I started to paint in 2003 and I paint anything and everything really. I love a challenge so there isn’t really a subject or medium I would turn away from — I dabble with everything. I am fairly well known for my paintings of roses and my glass works and enjoy painting both. My commissioned work seems to revolve mostly around portraiture and pets where I try to capture the subject’s character along with a good likeness. I’ve been fortunate to have sold pieces worldwide via my previous website, my blog, and word of mouth.

Everything I paint is for sale if it isn’t in my journals or commissioned and I am currently trying to get around to updating my Etsy shop with some pieces — it’s been on my to-do list for some time but I will get there. I’m also currently making some ACEO art to list in time for Christmas. For the past year or so I have been keeping a daily illustrated journal that has helped to ensure I am creative every day. It’s been a while since I worked on anything else, besides commission work; it’s too tempting to take my journals on location through the summer months but winter is approaching fast so the studio is looking most tempting!

cranberrywhip-eyecandy-soldCC: What prompted you to start a blog? What keeps you going?
AD:
I honestly can’t remember what prompted me to start my blog, my memory is a little erratic like that. I think I just visited one once and thought…I could do that!

My regular visitors keep me going, without a doubt. It is wonderful to have their support and feel I am speaking to someone rather than vacant airwaves when I type out my post for the day. I post EVERY day without fail; this actually works for me, I am best under pressure and knowing I have to post something each day urges me to do something creative even when I have very little time or energy…It’s a daily kick on the butt pushing me to be productive. I love blogging and I am so grateful for all the wonderful people I have come to know through my blog.

max-soldCC: How did you become involved with EDM? What do you enjoy most about your affiliation?
AD:
Emma-Jane Rosenberg told me about EveryDayMatters [EDM] when we met for a sketch crawl date and I joined as soon as I got home. I have met some great people there. I think it is a wonderful spotlight for bloggers to unite and feel they have an audience to blog to. I have visited blogs before that have no comments at all and I admire that they still continue; I’m not sure I would post day in day out if I thought no one was looking. I’m sure this would effect my productivity too. Knowing someone will look encourages me to create and EDM provides a friendly and supportive platform.

dscf4491CC: Where do you do your creative work?
AD:
I started by working at the end of my dining room table. Lack of space prompted an outside studio, which was a huge building project and looks wonderful BUT it killed me to make the choice between my family and my art in the evenings — leaving them was very difficult for me. So, now I have a conservatory next to the open-plan dining room, kitchen, and lounge, smack bang in the heart of the home and I LOVE IT! I get so much more done and often create a journal page between peeling the spuds and basting a beef joint.

dscf4475CC: Do you have a schedule for your creative work?
AD: No. In my opinion, schedules create disappointment when they aren’t met so I simply ‘live’ art. If I get five minutes while the kettle boils, three hours while the house is empty or three minutes before darting out of the truck to run up the school and collect my youngest…I make the most of them. My journal goes EVERYWHERE with me.

If you threw a penny away each day throughout your life because it was worthless by the time you reached the ripe age of 70 you’d be over £25,000 worse off. I try to make the most of every moment, however insignificant it seems at the time and I am always pleased I did, no matter what the result, I feel I did something.

25may07-harrybCC: How has motherhood changed you creatively?
AD:
Motherhood has made me whole. I feel confident and loved enough to be myself, faults and all, which has opened so many creative avenues for me to explore!

CC: What do you struggle with most?
AD:
Hmmm, struggle…there’s a word! I guess I would have to say that I struggle most with my own creativity and the speed and abundance of it. I have a hundred ideas a day and I want to do them all.

lounge-29may07CC: Where do you find inspiration?
AD:
I am a thinker and a dreamer…Nothing is uninspiring to me, Everything holds an emotion…mystery…hidden beauty!

CC: What are your top 5 favorite blogs?
AD: That’s like asking me my favorite song…I have hundreds all for different reasons and moods. The most useful is the EDM SuperBlog because it gives me a variety of creativity in one single link, a quick fix with my morning cuppa before I head off to take Harry to school.

CC: What is your greatest indulgence?
AD:
The midnight hours, they are all mine! The house is silent and I can start to unravel all of those voices, ideas and notes in my head and file them into some kind of order. The earth is still and I am aware of my place on it and all the wonderful ways in which I am blessed. I can work and keep a single chain of thought and open the gates for ideas to come flooding through. I’m a night owl, always have been, it’s normal for me to climb into bed at 3 a.m. and be up again at 7:30 a.m. to start the day…although getting out of bed is a problem (I love my snooze button) and I am useless before black coffee hits my lips!05july08

CC: What are you reading right now?
AD:
(BLUSH) I’m a child at heart, I don’t read so much as look at pictures. I could look at pictures all day but my attention span is challenged by text…However, I love to write.

gs-final-soldCC: What advice would you offer to other mothers struggling to find the time and means to be more creative?
AD:
Don’t mentally separate the two: It shouldn’t be a choice between motherhood OR creativity. Combine them and be a creative mum. Okay, so you may well want to paint a realistic rendition of the Mona Lisa but if the day doesn’t allow for it don’t mope, excusing lack of creativity to time or the children, just be creative in a different way. Kids love to join in and offer some great inspiration and ideas.

Believe you are worth it: It may seem like just a few sketches or another long scarf to everyone else but it is i27october08mportant to you and you should be important to those you live with. Don’t be afraid to take time out, space alone to clear your mind of daily chores and allow yourself moments to be you, not Mum, not Wife, not cook…YOU!

Wanting time to yourself now and then doesn’t make you a bad mother, taking that time will make you a happier one!

CC: Very well said, Anita — thank you!

Miranda: “Someday” is today

someday_sky1I can’t remember where I picked it up, but at some point last week I heard the old reminder “‘Someday’ is today.” Those three words have been repeating in my head ever since.

When you aspire to living in the moment, it’s easy to forget about all those things you want to do “someday.” The only things that belong on a “someday” list, however, are things that you might be interested in but won’t regret if you never get to them: like taking a Thai cooking class or getting dreadlocks. If the prospect of not doing something on that list is upsetting, then it doesn’t belong on a “someday” list. It should move onto a real agenda. Because really, someday is today — and if dreadlocks really speak to who you are, then you need to figure out how to make that happen now, rather than leaving it to fantasy.

While I continually make progress incorporating creativity into my life — an erratic but upward stagger — I realize there are things on my “someday” list that I really could — and should (“should” because it would make me happy) — be doing right now.

For example, I’d like to have an art space in my basement. I have a huge, unfinished basement that is dry and not too unpleasant. There isn’t a lot of stuff down there because we moved many things into storage when we put our house on the market. We have a playroom of sorts in one area of the basement. Why not cobble together a studio so that I can do art projects whenever I like, without taking over the kitchen table or the dining room? A place where I can leave projects mid-progress, without having to clean everything up after every creative stint? I could put something together with little or no cost. Sure, I’m trying to sell my house, but so what? I don’t think that an informal studio area, even if it does get a little cluttered, is going to bother prospective buyers. (And the whole house selling thing is a “someday” trap if ever there was one.)

I also realized that I have another category of “someday” items that I never intended to put off; they’ve been relegated to the “someday” list by accident. These are things that I think I’m going to do “tomorrow,” but then tomorrow never comes. Every week I seem to repeat the same thing: “Well, THIS week is really busy because of X. Next week will be better, and then I’ll be able to do Y.” But then the next week I’m all “Well, THIS week is really busy because of Q. Next week…” And so on. Of course, this mythical week of relative calm and predictable schedule never arrives — and so I eternally put off whatever it was that I wanted to do. It’s a slow kind of death by the best of intentions. Who am I kidding? You’d think I’d have figured it out by now. I have five children and a freelance career. Obviously, relative calm and a predictable schedule are not high on the list of likely outcomes. Some weeks will be better than others; some weeks will be busier than others; but really, the bandwidth is not going to change that drastically.

Here are two examples of things that I intend to get to, but never incorporate as reliable habits:

  1. I’d like to spend less time on the computer (specifically time wasted on the computer). I always feel better when I put my laptop away for a day. And the kids love it too. Anyone who really needs to reach me urgently has my cell phone number. Even if I don’t go fully unplugged, I know I’m better off having set computer times — a few brief stints at specific intervals. Aside from my two full workdays (when I’m glued to my laptop nonstop) there is no reason that I can’t adopt a more reasonable computer routine. Making this happen today instead of later means spending more time focused on the kids, now, when they need me, which is another “someday” item of its own. Do I want to wait until ALL the children head off to college and I realize that I missed my chance to spend more time with them — and that the false promise of “someday” has actually evaporated?
  2. I’d like to get back on top of dinnertime. I usually cook something vaguely nutritious at least four or five times a week, but lately it always seems like my oldest one has just returned from work (at a coffee shop) and isn’t hungry or I cooked something that the ninth-grade son doesn’t like or I timed things badly and my stuffed squash isn’t actually ready until 8:00 p.m. — which is bedtime for the pre-schooler. (Tonight’s scenario, for example.) I want to increase my repertoire of yummy “regular” meals (the most recent set is getting tired) and add a little more ceremony — and creativity — to dinnertime.

Those are my “someday” items for the moment. I can’t say that “work on my book” is on my “someday” list, because I AM actually writing with some vague regularity right now. I’m even running, although not more than 2-3 times a week — but running nonetheless. So there are two perennial “someday” items that I am actually doing.

How about you? What’s on your “someday” list that you really should and could start doing right now? And what “someday” items have you actually moved into the “now” column?

11/05 Weekly creativity contest winner & new prompt

A nice show of hands for this week’s creativity contest prompt. Our two-time defending champion is on a streak! Jen Johnson wins again. Go, Jen! (Is this like that dude on Jeopardy, or what?) Your $10 amazon.com gift certificate has been sent. Jen writes: “I’d thought I knew what I wanted to write as soon as I saw the new prompt last Tuesday, but the week got in the way with no writing at all. So here we are, Election Day, and this morning I found myself scribbling lines on scrap paper while running around after the toddler. The poem below is the result of about an hour’s much-interrupted scribbling. And given my Mama’s Magic Studio motto –- ‘Where Handmade Magic Happens!’ — I just couldn’t resist sending you my ‘avatar’ photo.” Just goes to show what you can do with an hour. I appreciate that Jen used a rhyming pattern without veering into cuteness, which is difficult — and I like the timely election reference.

Hands (The Personal is Political)
Tap the keyboard,
Knead the bread,
Paint the canvas,
Make the bed,mm-avatar-square-bright-large

Knit the sweater,
Wrap the gift,
Braid the tresses,
Mend the rift,

Wield the hammer,
Sweep the rug,
Tend the bruises,
Squeeze the hug,

Push the stroller,
Mold the clay,
Burp the baby,
Show the way,

Cast the ballot,
Skip the rope,
Thread the needle,
Pray for hope.

 

From Cathy Coley, a lovely pairing of past and present: “A new poem and an old drawing exercise from high school: 3 views of my own hand. 25 years apart.”

mother’s hands
in many pots, but most
importantly rubbing backs,
smoothing tears,
running through
baby fine and thicker hair
lifetime source of comfort.

04-18-2007-102725am

 

From Juliet Bell, a treat for everyone! “Hands -– now there’s an interesting prompt. I’m a palmist. Hands are far more than magnificent tools; they are an encapsulation of who we are, our personalities, our foibles, our talents, our ups and downs, and so much more. They are a window through which we can see our unique magnificence. I thought I would use this prompt to diagram and highlight some of the features that creative people will most likely find in their hands. As you read, please note that this is very general, and as in astrology, it is the full combination of all in your hand that fills out the picture of just who you are as a unique individual. You will want primarily to look at your dominant hand as this is the one which shows what you are doing with the talents you brought into the world with you (shown in the non-dominant hand).” [Click on the image for a larger view.]

hand-creative-construction-diagram1

  1. The head line will likely curve down toward the moon area (blue). The farther down it slopes, the more you draw on your unconscious, the more creative you are likely to be. The more horizontal the head line, the more you will want your creativity to have a practical application (make money, for instance).
  2. The Apollo or Sun finger (ring finger) will be significant. This is the finger of self expression, love of beauty, and artistic endeavors. It will likely extend beyond the halfway point of the top phalange of the middle finger; there may be a line or lines on the hand extending toward the mount (base) of the finger. The longer the line, the more that artistic self-expression is part of your personal destiny. Many shorter lines above the heart line indicate a lover of the arts.
  3. The Mercury finger (little finger) will show the role communication plays in your life, and the degree to which you may have commercial success. If it extends into the top phalange (top crease) of the ring finger, then it is long. This indicates that communication is a vital component of your creativity. This will often be demonstrated by a need or desire to put your work out there for the world.
  4. The Jupiter finger (index) will indicate ambition and leadership (among other things). If this finger is as long as Apollo or longer, then you are very ambitious, and will show much drive toward accomplishing your goals.
  5. The will portion of the thumb (top section) will show your ability to accomplish your goals as opposed to just thinking about them. If it is in good proportion to the rest of the thumb, or longer, then you have the will power to do what you need to make things happen.
  6. The finger tips will show the way in which you attack most of what you do. The more pointed the finger tips and nails are, the more you rely on gut feelings; your ideas and feelings come to you and you act on them. The more squared your finger tips and nails are, the more reasoning your approach will be, and the more practicality will flavor what you do.
  7. The fingers themselves indicate your orientation to the world. The smoother the fingers, the more spontaneous you will be; knotted joints will slow you down, cause you to ponder before taking action. The length of your fingers in relation to the palm is significant. Fingers longer than the length of the palm indicates a love of detail and minutia, a thinker, slow to speak and act. Short fingers indicate a talent for seeing the big picture, and a quick mind — quick in thought and action.

I hope you found this fun and validating.

 

From Kelly Warren: “This is my first attempt playing around with Adobe Illustrator. The words in the background are the lyrics to one of my favorite Sugarland songs. I’ll leave the rest up to interpretation.”

 

What I'd Give

 

From me (Miranda): I got so carried away with Election Day that I forgot my own advice to create a contest entry before the eleventh hour! After a moment of panic, I came up with an idea that I was able to execute on my laptop while watching the election returns last night.

 

seven_hands

 

This week’s prompt: “Self-portrait”

Use the prompt however you like — literally, or a tangential theme. All media are welcome. Please e-mail your entries to creativereality@live.com by 10:00 p.m. eastern time (GMT -5) on Tuesday, November 11. The winning entry receives a $10 gift certificate to amazon.com. Writers should include their submission directly in the body text of their e-mail. Visual artists and photographers should attach an image of their work as a jpeg. Enter as often as you like; multiple submissions for a single prompt are welcome. There is no limit to how many times you can win the weekly contest, either. (You do not have to be a contributor to this blog in order to enter. All are invited to participate.) All submissions are acknowledged when received; if you do not receive e-mail confirmation of receipt within 24 hours, please post a comment here. Remember, the point here is to stimulate your output, not to create a masterpiece. Keep the bar low and see what happens. Dusting off work you created previously is OK too. For more info, read the original contest blog post.

Cathy: Crying out in the wilderness

I’m having one of those moments — one of those really bad moments of a stay-at-home mother or a writer. The kind where you can hear yourself screaming, but it’s as if everyone else in your home is looking right past you, no matter what you may be saying. In a movie, the lens would be panning through the doors, around the room and from a distance into close up, the sound of a scream gaining momentum until the camera is zooming into an open mouth of a crazed woman standing, in — Oh, I don’t know, let’s put her in the kitchen, with a steaming pot on the stove and a mess of undue proportion all around, but finally the camera goes into that cavern of a mouth, dodges past teeth and tongue, spotlights the uvula, and goes black, and silent. When the scene comes back up, she’s standing there, stunned look on her face, flyaway hair escaping ponytail, and breathing stiltedly.

This is also a common feeling for anyone who deals on a regular basis with someone on the autism spectrum. So I am having a triple whammy day of it — the regular wife and mother moment, the writer moment, and the aspie mom moment of it. So I thought I’d put it to good use. Maybe if someone stumbles across this blog as any one of the above, they’ll know they are not alone without having to feel like they should go on Oprah to talk about it. Following are just a few parts of my particular scenario that have led me to this moment:

  1. I’m still kind of feeling like I’m writing in a void since I don’t have an income from it, although I’m generally doing much better about that feeling while actively working on a novel.
  2. I spent much of yesterday, side by side with my aspie son, looking for the floor in his room — a sea of drawings, started and stopped over and over, because it just wasn’t perfect enough for him. He kept zoning out into whatever caught his attention. I kept calling his name and giving a different list: his list of choices to put things: paper to be recycled, paper to be saved, non-paper garbage or toy bucket. We made it about ¾ of the way through the mess in three hours, mostly by me and by my yelling “S- S- S– look at me — look at this — is this drawing to be saved or recycled? S- S- S– look at me — look at this — is this drawing to be saved or recycled? S- S- S– look at me — look at this — is this drawing to be saved or recycled?”
  3. My husband has not mowed the lawn in a month. The grass is taller than the dog. I know I got us out of the house last weekend for the whole weekend, essentially, so I intentionally backed out of plans for this weekend, except trick or treat, so that we could focus on what slid last weekend, especially the lawn. I finally started to ‘nag’ about it, and then he actively refused to do it. Now I must mention, we have a history with the lawn that involves my ‘green’ mower and doing it myself vs the gas mower and his doing it, in which I have been shut out of the argument due to my recent bedrest pregnancy complications and the fact that I’m still ‘recovering’ from that year in bed and one of the complications.
  4. I also have a teen son. His reaction time, if there is one, happens in stop gap motion. Have you ever seen anyone really look as if they are moving through molasses? That is K. And his slow motion voice has deepened to sound a lot like one of those slow motion effects, too. “Whaaaaaaa…”
  5. I’m more often than not, pinned nursing my lovely baby, which leads to a feeling of helplessness to accomplish one complete task from beginning to end. Not to mention the sleep deprivation involved. Too late.
  6. Economy is a huge issue and my darling husband is a classic sort — the quiet type who thinks he has to take care of it all himself and will probably give himself a heart attack trying rather than communicate better, so I end up having a freak-out moment because of the periodic buildup between us. Of course this only leads to my looking like a drama queen, and doesn’t get us effectively communicating, because he stands there in stunned silence at the monster who has taken possession of his petite, usually fairly sunny disposition wife, complete with flying laundry baskets.
  7. I have my period. Period.

Thanks for listening, and if you ever have the same feeling, feel free to leave a comment below. I must say, having vented, I feel much better already, nearly as well as if I had called a girlfriend and laughed about the same. Maybe now I can rewash that laundry that flew down the stairs last night along with the three day old few sips of coffee I had left by my bedside. Yuck, spotty.

Poll: What does your creativity mean to you?

Election Day is upon us! Warm up your voting muscles with the poll below. Click the link to participate and view the results, which are anonymous.

Which of the following statements best describes how you feel about your creative work?
( polls)

Online Resource for Writers: Fiction Lounge

I recently stumbled into Adam Maxwell’s Fiction Lounge, and I’m glad that I did. While clearly a vehicle for promoting the author’s work, Maxwell’s site is attractively designed and offers a free writers’ prompt tool, which might just be enough to prod you out of a fit of writer’s block should you happen to experience that nasty affliction. There’s also a fun character name generator, which is mildly addictive, and an award-winning podcast of Maxwell’s short fiction. Enjoy!

Breakfast with Laurie

Halloween greetings! You won’t find anything ghoulish about this week’s Breakfast visitor, however: meet Laurie Wheeler, intrepid fiber artist and mother of two. You will find more than a skein’s worth of inspiration here though — so brew a fresh cup of whatever you like to drink in the morning and enjoy.

CC: Who are you?
LW:
What an interesting question! The conventional answer is this: I am Laurie Wheeler, a woman who is mother of two, wife, fiber artist, and would be author/editor. The more interesting answer is that I’m a woman with a degree in international relations who has lived, loved, and worked in 23 countries and four continents. As an expatriate I always chose to live in the local communities and never behind the compound walls with other people from my own country. I love people, observing their lifestyles, cultures, and philosophies. In summary, I am the sum of my total experiences, minus those I have yet to experience.

CC: What do you do?
LW:
When I’m not homeschooling my 15-year-old daughter and 12-year-old son, I’m leading the charge at the Crochet Liberation Front HQ on Ravelry.com and on our website and blog. They call me fearless leader. My kids think that’s really funny. (“Geez Mom, they’ve never seen you run away from a bee!”)

CC: What do you do in the creative domain?
LW: (Have you ever tried homeschooling a teenager?) Crochet, hand spinning, needle felting, wet felting, and the occasional foray into mixed media (nothing I’ve been satisfied with yet, but hey someday!), oh yeah and I just finished putting together a 194-page, full-color collaborative work entitled Crochet Liberation Front, First Ever Book. I also have a rather nice herb garden and enjoy cooking and making home preserves. I also play around with an intuitive painting technique.

It is my belief that the axiom “I think therefore I am” is only part of the story for human beings. “I create, therefore I am” is a far more accurate statement.

CC: How did Crochet Liberation Front (CLF) come to life?
LW:
The story of how the group came to be can be short or long. The short version is that I was tired, suffering from insomnia, and being silly; in other words it was a joke. The long version mirrors my own creative journey as a fiber artist.

I learned to crochet after I learned to embroider, which means I was somewhere around 6 or 7 years old. I know I was crocheting at 8 years old because I made a hideous granny square (pink/purple and red) for my great-grandmother. My great grandmother taught me to crochet, and treasured all of my awful first creations. I crocheted off and on throughout my childhood and teens, even though it was not the cool thing to do. I put the hook down when I went to college in England, but picked it up again when I was in my third trimester of pregnancy with my oldest child and was forced into bedrest. Faced with a month in bed I spent my last free day scouring the country of Bahrain for hooks and yarn or thread. I couldn’t find any yarn, but I found thread and a lace hook, and with those supplies I managed to survive the bedrest and make lots of “pretties” for my daughter-to-be.

Fast forward: I came back to the USA in 1998 a single mother with two kids and not a lot of money (that’s another story). I crocheted all of our Christmas ornaments that year because I couldn’t afford to buy anything. In fact I made many of the presents for friends and family that year as well. I didn’t think what I did was art, I didn’t think too much of it at all. It was just something you do. Art is painting and drawing and sculpture — my brother’s the artist; I’m the “brain.” In short, art was something I couldn’t do.

In 2000 I got married a second time, to a wonderful man who happens to be a park ranger. He was the first person to really make me take a second look at the things I made with hook and thread or yarn. “How do you take that stuff and make it do what you want?” he’d ask. I hadn’t really thought about it, my answer was, “You just do it.”

In 2001 we moved to Camano Island for Jeff to run two fabulous Washington State Parks. Deciding we would remain in that area until he retired, I set out getting to know the people in the community. One day I met a woman in the local craft store and my world changed. Ann Hopkins, a local art teacher and fiber artist, declared that she was going to teach me hand spinning. I don’t know about you, but ever since I first read Rumpelstiltskin I wanted to learn how to use a spinning wheel! I jumped at the chance to learn a dying art.

It was in taking up spinning that the early kernels of the CLF were conceived. As I learned to spin and found books and magazines on the subject, almost all the information revolved about yarn and knitting. There was almost nothing about crochet in the literature. I don’t knit (not for lack of trying), and couldn’t understand why no one had information for spinning and crochet.

When I started attending larger fiber arts gatherings, hand-spinning events, and competitions I repeatedly got told, “Your yarn will work for you, you crochet.” The word “crochet” being said in a snide tone of voice. It really started to annoy me, because all of these people who had crocheted only edging or doilies (nothing wrong with either of those things, but I crochet everything out of necessity since I really am terrible with pointy sticks) kept telling me what I could and couldn’t do with my own yarn.

I have this kind of contrary nature, so the more they kept saying what couldn’t be crocheted, the more I endeavored to make the very things they said couldn’t be done. From sweaters to socks, bags, hats, and scarves, I used stitches they said didn’t exist, and made 3-D wall hangings.

The official story: The Crochet Liberation Front (CLF) came to life at 3 a.m. sometime in late July 2007. I had watched Monty Python’s The Life of Brian one too many times which is how our name became what it is…and was annoyed at how crochet is viewed by the fiber arts world in general. We’re really treated poorly by the industry, and often considered inferior by those who do other fiber arts. Initially the CLF was a cartoonish and sophomoric response to a craft world that was taking itself way too seriously. (As IF one craft could be superior to another other?! Pushaw!)

I turned the CLF into a real organization after we gained over 100 members by fall 2007, and saw that we really did have the potential to do some great work together.

What work? Well, liberating crochet, crochet hooks, and the hands that wield the hook! Liberation takes several forms:

  1. Busting really tired myths about what crochet is and is not. We do this by sharing our projects on Ravelry.com, and by me awarding really cool items on our blog!
  2. Supporting crocheters around the world to get out there, show crochet for what it is, be proud of what they love to do, and to form groups if they can.
  3. Encouraging people to design, or write articles. (This is how the book concept was born!)
  4. Taking on the publishing industry and craft yarn industry in the USA and abroad. They have all these things they like to say about crocheters. My personal favorite is, “They are cheap, they don’t use good yarn.” As a hand spinner I often raise an eyebrow at the yarn manufacturers because very little commercial yarn is what I would consider good…so I write to companies (and encourage others to do so as well) and ask them to clarify what they are saying. What they mean to say is we don’t buy expensive yarn. And, I do not think that is true in the least. I think they have not marketed to crocheters. When they do, crocheters will know about their products. You can’t buy what you’ve never heard of.
  5. Liberating our creative selves. We in the CLF do not think that the whole of crochet’s designing potential has been tapped. So we’re one big support party for opening our creative veins and pouring out our hooking souls to make one big creative soup together!

CC: What prompted you to start a blog?
LW:
Well, it seemed like the right thing to do about 6 months after I founded the CLF. That’s when I started to award crocheters for outstanding, phenomenal, and well-made items. The blog was the easiest way to go. I occasionally rant on the blog just to stir things up a bit.

CC: And what sparked you to launch a podcast?
LW:
Um…it sounded like a good idea at the time? And the idea of having a “mock” news show amused me…

CC: How’s it going so far?
LW:
LOL…um…I put it out when I can. I still love to do the recording, but it’s one thing that gets put on hold more often than not. I do like the podcast because people can actually hear my voice, and actually hear that 90% of the time I’m not really “angry,” but sarcastically self amused.

CC: Where do you do your creative work?
LW:
I crochet anywhere and everywhere! That’s the great thing about crochet — it’s super portable. I crochet in the car, waiting in offices, all over the house, when I meet with friends. When you are kinesthetic it actually helps you concentrate on conversations to keep your hands busy. Spinning and needle felting happen at home in my room, and at the fiber arts group I host monthly in Stanwood, WA. Other creative endeavors happen on the deck outside or in the kitchen. When working on the CLF website or book I can work wherever I can find a wifi signal, so that means the local library or my best friend’s house.

CC: Do you have a schedule for your creative work?
LW:
Yes and no. I crochet all the time; if I’m sitting down I have yarn and a hook in my hands. Hand spinning happens a couple times a month (especially after a shoulder injury). Crochet Liberation Front activities happen from Tuesdays through Saturdays (the library is closed on Sundays and Mondays). I try to get a few hours a day in online. Felting? Intuitive painting? That’s a totally spontaneous deal — that happens when the muse strikes me.

CC: How has motherhood changed you creatively?
LW:
Before I was a mother, I wanted to be creative. I was musical, but that wasn’t my passion — I was just born with a set of good pipes. I wanted to create visually but I tried too hard, and had too many inhibitions. When my daughter was 18 months old she drew a smiley face for the first time. So I bought her crayons and markers to encourage her obvious talents, one problem; she wanted me to draw with her. So I learned to doodle. She and I would spend hours making scribbles together. I would say my children liberated my spirit, taught me to play, taught me to observe nature and forms in a new light, and most important taught me joy. All of this gave me a fresh perspective, and so I found my creativity.

CC: What do you struggle with most?
LW:
Tough question. I would say that taking time for myself, time for my work without feeling guilty. Being a child of the 1980s I was socialized to believe that you could be “superwoman.” I learned in my mid-20s that there was no way that could work, at least not for me. Even though I was told, “You can be anything or do anything” growing up, I still was socialized with women being in a role of organizer and social secretary, not to mention housekeeping and child rearing specialist. When you’re doing all of that it’s hard to have creative energy left. I used to grumble about this and tell folks, “It’s not fair, no one can do all of this and have time left for themselves…” But taking the responsibility for myself to make time for what I need to do to fuel myself was the biggest challenge. I feel less guilty now, maybe because the kids are older now, or I’m pushing 40. What’s funny is that I realized I was repressing myself, that no one else was doing it…Not that there wasn’t a little resistance from children and husband when I chose to take more for me, but that was just in relation to change…they’ve really found “When Mama’s not happy, nobody’s happy” to be a very true statement.

CC: Where do you find inspiration?
LW:
Everywhere! Everything! Everyone! From the past and present, I often mix color schemes and patterns from places I have lived in Africa and the Middle East. I take a lot of solace from my garden and the way the colors and textures play through the seasons. I love to create things for young people, and so I ask them what they want to have. It’s amazing what you get out of kids. Oh and recycling and repurposing things is a big thought in my mind now, I find myself looking at “garbage” and wondering what I can do to transform the items so they don’t end up in a landfill.

CC: What are your top 5 favorite blogs?

CC: Just for you: What is your greatest indulgence?
LW:
Buying, spinning, and then using exotic fibers to make myself something. I make myself something special once a year. I have a glass crochet hook that I use — it’s a uniquely indulgent sensation to put a cashmere/silk/beaded yarn to that hook…it’s almost better than really good chocolate.

CC: Library: What are you reading right now?
LW:
Children of Dune by Frank Herbert (I’m re-reading the whole series).

CC: Soapbox: What advice would you offer to other mothers struggling to find the time and means to be more creative?
LW:
OK, you asked for it, I got a soapbox and I’m not afraid to use it. First of all I think most times when people say “mothers” they mean mothers of young children or babies…You know we stay moms for the entirety of our kid’s lives, it doesn’t end. What happens are stages. If you have babies, there are things you have to adapt. Your creative energy is often going into mothering. But you can sit them on your lap and do things. I watched a young mother of a month old put her baby in the sling and sit and spin at her spinning wheel at our group. It was great to watch!

For creative pursuits that have toxic elements (paints, dye, glues) you have to make space for it where the kids won’t get into it. It may mean you have to wait awhile to get back to it. That’s OK too, it’s just seasons in life.

I can say that I did far less crocheting when the kids were toddlers than I do now. I was too busy running after them (especially my son who was like quick lightening!). It feels like the little ones will never grow up, but they do and fast. I would get in what little creative activity I could when they were sleeping. I was really excited when my son slowed down at about 5 and I suddenly had far more time to be creative!

Understand that your creativity comes and goes with your energy expenditure and life stages. The other thing is, make time. Just make time for you, even if that means a soak in the tub by yourself. For me, that soak can just get it all revved up again!

I would encourage mothers to share their creative pursuits with their children. I began sharing so the children felt less deprived when I did need time to do what I needed to do. It’s kind of what Dr. Christiane Northrop says about mothers and the people in their lives, we’re like the “cat dish,” nobody’s interested in what we are doing until we’re doing it!

When my daughter and I were struggling through the pre-teen/early teen stage it was awful. In fact I lost a lot of my creative juices because we were constantly in conflict. Then I taught her to crochet. It became a needed common ground; now we share a passion (and she does occasionally raids my yarn stash and hooks, but you know there’s worse things teenagers could raid!) and enjoy creating together. Likewise my son enjoys helping me dye yarn It’s the ultimate chemistry lab!

Have some boundaries on what you do. As much as you are sharing with your children let them know it’s an invitation to your world, and that your world has limits (such as “Hands off the cashmere, Darling, that’s mine!”).

CC: It’s been a treat, Laurie — thank you!

Cathy: The Stars, Universe, and Everything Serendipitous

Never in my life would I have imagined that I would be emailed from prominent astronomers for my own little project of a kids’ novel. So far, I have had contact from two. Granted, I have only queried them, and they’ve replied that they want to know what this is about, but it’s a start. I can’t wait to see how either will respond! Of course I noted that anything they could help me with is absolutely at their convenience, so it may be a long wait. I’m so great at shooting myself in the foot, as I don’t want to be a burden.

Even so, I feel legitimized by the networking and consulting process. This is no longer just my writing into a void. There is professional interest in what I have to say. My sense from each of these astronomers is they appreciate their field being trotted out in front of a bunch of kids who may grow up to be interested in astronomy. I hadn’t really considered my book as being influential in that way. The thought may have previously hovered in the back of my mind, but now, wow! I could be pointing some kids toward science down the road, in that far off dreamy distance of published youth novel in the hands of real readers. Who would have thought it? I certainly didn’t, at least not consciously.

NASA has a rocket science research institute (I hope I have that right) up the road from my house. A block in the opposite direction is my son S’s Taekwando Dojon. S has been branching out from his narrow areas of interest — Dinosaurs, Godzilla movies, Calvin and Hobbes, and now Star Wars — to studying the solar system and claiming he will be the first man to land on Mars. He was telling a dad at Taekwando his intentions in rocket building, space travel, and Mars. That father said to me, “I work at NASA, here’s my card, I’ll bring him some stickers next class, as long as you email to remind me.” Of course, by next class, my little head went Ding! And I asked if he had any contact with astronomers. He didn’t, but since I emailed him, he has also fallen into my networking and nicely emailed me a link to NASA speakers and more. Well how about that.

I am also really excited that S is running a parallel interest to what I’m writing. He’s great at feeding me facts I can use, and we have something we can finally share enthusiastically, both ways. That NASA dad took one look at S after his speech and said, “You know how many of the engineers and designers I work with over there probably started out just like him? Most of them.” He also told S that he was just about the right age to make that Mars dream happen. Right now, a project is in the works with a speculated landing date of about 30 years from now. S has been going around telling everyone about it for the past week since their conversation. Ah, my son — the future rocket scientist, spaceship designer, and astronaut.

All of this must have been written in the stars.

10/29 Weekly creativity contest winner & new prompt

The dreamy entries for this week’s creativity contest were irresistible. I found myself utterly paralyzed and unable to select a winner — and this post might have been eternally delayed if I hadn’t had a visit this morning from a dear friend and colleague who came by to drop off a new project. You can credit her for the new prompt, as well as for tipping the scales toward our defending champion (aka last week’s winner), Jen Johnson. Jen writes: “Fun prompt! Got me thinking about how my mom always swore one shouldn’t talk about dreams before breakfast, and it took off from there.” Beautiful work, Jen — your repeat $10 amazon.com gift certificate is on its way. For my part, clearly it’s time to line up more of my guest judges. This is hard work!

Love Charm
You are the endless dream
told before breakfast,
shared with deliberate intent
of it all coming true.

You are petals from daisies
plucked one at a time,
an apple skin peeled all at once
and tossed over the shoulder.

You are pennies saved
and flipped into a fountain,
an eyelash wish
blown from my fingertip —

it floats there, between us,
between dream and waking,
caught on the current of breath
before it falls.

 

From Karen Winters:
There are day dreams, night dreams, “dreams” that are heartfelt wishes and many other kinds to explore. And even our pets, it seems, have dreams. If you’ve had a dog as a member of your family no doubt you’ve seen them making running motions or even small vocalizations as their eyes dart back and forth beneath closed eyelids.

So, my entry this week is a page from my Moleskine sketchbook, entitled “Dog Dreams” — which features an imaginary interpretation of what my American bulldog (girl), “Ripley” sees when she slumbers.

Dreaming can be a powerful tool in our creative life, which I learned when I interviewed Patricia Garfield (author of Creative Dreaming) for shows on Dreams and Nightmares on ABC’s 20/20 newsmagazine.

It was Garfield’s influence that prompted me to start keeping dream journals, a practice that I’ve carried out for decades, with varying degrees of devotion. These days, my dreams are my nighttime studio in which I work out solutions. I let my unconscious do the work while my body rests. It’s not uncommon for me to wake up with a picture in my mind that I have “seen” in a dream. So if someone asks me how much time a day I spend on art, I can actually say “practically 24/7.” However, unlike Ripley I do not dream of bones, gophers and kibbles. At least not yet.

This sketch was painted with a Japanese ink brush pen, which gives a wonderful thick and thin line that is as responsive as a paint brush.

 

From Cathy Coley:

Dreams
You slept between us,
little warm breath before dawn,
a tiny cry, so unusual from my happy baby.
Heart breaking, I considered waking you.
Another whimper and cry, a few more,
I imagined what may be going on
in your mind, so complex already.
Were you frightened, pulled suddenly from my arms?
Did you miss the dog, your dearest companion?
Was something happening to your big brothers
you felt helpless to do anything about?
Something about daddy?
He patted your belly and shush’d.
Waking you to comfort kept crossing my drowsy heart.
I thought, you’ll learn to deal with worse than this:
a night cry you’ll soon forget, if you knew at all.
Maybe you will be wiser than I,
resolve the problems of your dreams before waking.
You quieted and settled.
Furrowed brow smoothed back to round innocence
as the sun slowly rose, bluing the window from black,
Better without my intrusion to your sleep.

 

From Kelly Warren:
I’ve been thinking about this week’s creativity challenge ever since it was posted. I’ve thought about my dreams, the slumber-wrapped type, usually full length films in my case; I’ve thought about writing a bit of poetry or verse talking about what dreams I’ve dreamt or have yet to dream; I’ve thought about old loves that still haunt my dreams and wonder how and where they are; and I’ve thought about dreams I had in my younger days and paused to consider if they’ve come to be. But in sitting here tonight, working on jewelry for my show this weekend, listening to the girls’ laughter as DH gives them their evening bath, it hit me: I’m living my dream. Sure, I’m strapped for time….always have been, always will be. If it’s not the current things I have going on, I’d undoubtedly come up with something else. My plate is simply designed to be overflowing; I’m starting to accept that now. But really, what have I to complain about? I live in a beautiful home on the water, I have a very patient and supportive husband who puts up with all my hair-brained schemes, and I have two beautiful little red-headed daughters who light up my world every day. And while I may complain about the daily grind from time to time, I have a good job and a rewarding career that most of the time I enjoy, while others are losing their jobs left and right in these times of stock market crashes and dwindling state funds. I’ve certainly been through my share of sadness, maybe even more than the average, but who hasn’t had a touch of tragedy in their lives? Maybe I’ve been blessed with a happy spirit, I don’t know, but I’ve always been able to find a tiny bit of sunlight in every storm cloud. So I choose to believe that, yes, I am living my dream. It’s all in how you look at it, don’t you think?

 

From me (Miranda):

For the past 15 years or so, I’ve had a recurring dream. I call it the House Dream. The theme is always the same: I am visiting a new house that I’ve just bought or am about to buy. In each dream, the house is completely different and utterly concrete to its last detail. As I tour the house, I discover that there is a huge section of the house that I didn’t know about — a bonus wing, or a massive underground living space, or that an upstairs bedroom opens out onto a shopping mall — and that the previous owners have left behind things of value that are ours for the taking: useful clothes, jewelry, books, or furniture.

In the process of exploring the house, I can’t believe my good fortune. I’m in awe of this incredible place that I’m going to be living in. It’s really too good to be true, I tell myself — I must be dreaming again. But no, this time it’s real. The dream is so vivid that I always fall for it: the design of the faucet in the kitchen sink, the pattern of the carpet in the dining room (there was that one where the dining room was the size of a modest restaurant and the pope was coming for dinner; staff were preparing for the visit and setting all the tables with cream-colored linens, pale gold utensils, and large ornate plate chargers — meanwhile the carpeting was dark green and printed with a floral pattern; perhaps not worthy of His Holiness); the pattern of a lace curtain in a bathroom window, the wood grain of a child’s bunk bed built into the wall. And then, always before actually moving in, I wake up. It takes me a moment to realize that yet again, the House Dream was just a dream, and I am back in my own boring bedroom.

Naturally, I’ve thought a lot about what the House Dream means. At one point I decided it was a metaphor for my own creativity — that I have everything I need right now in order to create; I just need to find it (that “bonus wing”). I’m not sure if that’s right. In the meantime, I look forward to my next nocturnal house tour — although I don’t look forward to the crash of re-entry, and the sucker punch of knowing that I fell for my own fantasy yet again.

 

This week’s prompt: “Hands”

Use the prompt however you like — literally, or a tangential theme. All media are welcome. Please e-mail your entries to creativereality@live.com by 10:00 p.m. eastern time (GMT -5) on Tuesday, November 4. The winning entry receives a $10 gift certificate to amazon.com. Writers should include their submission directly in the body text of their e-mail. Visual artists and photographers should attach an image of their work as a jpeg. Enter as often as you like; multiple submissions for a single prompt are welcome. There is no limit to how many times you can win the weekly contest, either. (You do not have to be a contributor to this blog in order to enter. All are invited to participate.) All submissions are acknowledged when received; if you do not receive e-mail confirmation of receipt within 24 hours, please post a comment here. Remember, the point here is to stimulate your output, not to create a masterpiece. Keep the bar low and see what happens. Dusting off work you created previously is OK too. For more info, read the original contest blog post.