Last week I ranted about the mannequin-style approach at Mom Bloggers Club. Amy and Emma-Jane pointed out that the site’s header depicts women who are clearly NOT at home trying to bang out a blog post on an old laptop with a shift key that no longer works while the forgotten broccoli steams to mush on the stove and the kids pull each other’s hair out in front of a Disney DVD.
Many of you who shared the pain may be glad to hear about Moms without Blogs, a site for mother bloggers and non-bloggers who DON’T aspire to be the Martha Stewarts of the web. Moms without Blogs is “a team of super-cool chicas from around the country (both with and without blogs) who are committed to building this community of average supermoms by sharing our stories as real modern-day mamas. We each contribute an original, distinct flavor and style to this enterprise but together we are ‘MWOB.'” From the site’s about page:
Moms without Blogs is a place for moms and women to congregate together, support one another and gain strength in the knowledge that we are not alone when we feel oh so far from having it all together.
There’s a ton of information these days flying around at moms and moms-to-be about what we need to do or should be doing to be “good” moms. So much in fact that sometimes it’s hard to hear the most important voice of all — our own.
This space in the blogosphere is made up of women who are working hard to embrace our feelings of inadequacy as mothers and to remind ourselves that it’s okay to have a bad day, it’s okay to not have an organic meal prepared for dinner, it’s okay to not have a blog where we write about our fabulous educational outings with our kids, it’s okay to not to have an innovative craft project planned for a Saturday afternoon, it’s okay to yell at our kids from time to time, it’s okay to have piles of dirty laundry in the hallway, it’s okay to feel buried by an avalanche of paper, it’s okay to not want to enroll our kids in a slew of classes to make sure they are “exceptional”, and it’s okay to admit that the happiest time of the day is the end of the day when the kids are finally asleep.
And most of all, our mission over here at MWOB is that, although there are external signs everywhere pointing us in all kinds of directions telling us what it means to be a supermom, we know that the real truth is…
“Being a supermom is simply a state of mind.” So get yourself in the right state of mind and spread the word.
Now THAT’S a little more like it, wouldn’t you say?
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yes, thank you! tagging favorite!
YES! Love it. 🙂
looks pretty cool. thanks for sharing.
Has anyone else noticed that there seem to be only two voices in the what-it-means-to-be-a-mother conversation?
There’s 1) We should be superwomen and try our hardest to achieve perfection. And 2) We’re not superwomen and perfection is impossible.
While #2 is an infinetely more realistic, and attainable, notion, I can’t help feeling somewhat offended by the idea that whatever I manage to cobble together is enough–that I’m only measured against my own best and worst–and if I’m doing the best I can, that’s okay. It sounds good to hear, of course, but it’s only true if I am putting forth my best effort at all times. I don’t want to be in the same company as a mother who’s given up, and just slaps together whatever and calls it good enough.
It reminds me of the saying “To whom much is given, much is expected.” Those of us entrusted with the muchness of rearing children owe them much in return.
I wish that there was actually a third voice in the conversation (and maybe that’s the purpose of Creative Construction is) that would say, “Wait a minute. Maybe it’s too much to ask us to be Superwoman, but there are choices we as women can make that define how super a mother we can be, and here is what works and what doesn’t…”
thanks, brittany…excellent point. i get entirely frustrated with the polarization of almost any topic, but this one in particular hits home. some days, yes, superwoman, somedays, reluctant superwoman, other days, i throw it all to the winds and would prefer to crawl back into bed. some days, i just think, holding a conversation with this child right now , if even for less than five minutes, is the best thing i can do. and what a best it is, even if the laundry isn’t done and i haven’t finished my novel.
i think the reason we keep having variations of this conversation here is the constant mutability of motherhood, creativity , balance, and what it means to each of us in a given moment.
i read few of the blogs at the above site and found that it wasn’t so much a blast it all, i suck , so deal, as a pretty similar conversation we have here.