Miranda: Getting your ducks in a row (rubber and otherwise)
As I slowly emerge from nearly two weeks of illness (it’s been months, if I include the rest of the family) and my ear infection finally lifts, I’m looking cautiously at the week ahead, and trying to manage my expectations. I realize that in order to maximize my opportunities–even simply my opportunities to do nothing–I need to get the family to cooperate as much as possible.
My kids and husband are troopers about “self-serve” dinner nights–they’ll eat leftovers or something in the freezer from Trader Joe’s. It’s been quite a while since I’ve regularly prepared good, homemade dinners at least five nights a week–and I feel guilty about it, but at the moment, food prep is one area that I’ve chosen to sacrifice. (What I don’t like about self-serve, however, is that we tend not to sit down together for a family meal unless I’ve actually prepared one–and that used to be every night without fail. But that’s another story.)
I wonder if there are strategies that any of you have used to “make” more time for yourself during the day/week? Shortcuts? Things like trying to set yourself up for success when working at home with younger children: play with them, connect with them, make sure they are well fed, watered, and changed, and THEN set them up with something that encourages independent play–before turning to your own work? Maybe you’ve discovered that turning the dining table into a fort, using a few old blankets, will keep the kids entertained for the better part of an hour while you type at the counter? Maybe your spouse, if you have one, feels less neglected if you talk for 30 minutes after the kids go to bed, before you settle down for a work/creativity stint? Or maybe you’re really efficient with time spent waiting at dance classes and basketball classes?
One routine I’ve enjoyed recently is reading while my three-year-old takes a bath. My husband drags a comfy chair into the bathroom for me every night, and I sit beside the tub and read, an arm’s length away, while my son goes to town with his bath toys. Sure, sometimes he wants my attention, and that’s fine–I put my book down when he wants to talk or needs me to wind up the frog family–but most of the time he’s absorbed in imaginary play for a long time (up to an hour!) and I get a lot of reading done that way. It ends up feeling like a treat.
Since I have older children too, I’m pretty good about establishing chores for each kid, and making sure they follow through. I rarely clean up after dinner, for example, unless I’ve gone all out and the kitchen is a total disaster. My feeling is: I made dinner, they can clean up afterward. And if I didn’t cook, well then, it’s just a matter of everyone cleaning up after themselves. They also have weekly chores to take care of. While I think these responsibilities are important for each child’s self-esteem, now that the kids are older their help really makes a difference–it’s not just busywork.
Does anyone have any other ways to squeeze more minutes from the day?
Studio Mothers: Life & Art 